Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Greased up

Got all greased up for my swim this evening. Well one arm did.

 In case my rampant daily intake of food (two breadrolls, half a quiche and a token salad for lunch alone) doesn't yield enough blubbery insulating protection, I'd read that grease might help.

Remember when Frankie Vallie sang "Grease is the word, is the word that you heard; it's got groove, it's got meaning; Grease is the time, is the place, is the motion; Grease is the way we are feeling"? Well, he was wrong. I'm not doing grease. I'll just have to eat more.

Not sure how the gym pool cleaners will feel tomorrow about the residue of my experiment...

1 comment:

  1. From the article link:

    "On a credit side I would suggest that jelly-fish stings are very much less if a thin smear of a heavy water-resistant shell grease is used on the body and limbs. It also, for me anyway, acts like a voodoo against sharks. I imagine that the grease might well give an unattractive chemical stimulus to the shark's receptors during its accustomed run in alongside your body for the "rub-taste" before it makes up its primitive mind to come in on its preset course with fixed snap-ready jaws agape!"

    And that, my friends, would seem to be the deciding factor on the issue, judging by the abovementioned fear of sharks and jellyfish!!!! Grease up little grease monkey!!

    Great articles, keep them coming!!!


Wayne likes pork pies and Guinness. He likes routine and predictability. He loves his family. He's 40+, short(ish), balding and battling with waistline expansion. He's been known to occasionally play a good round of golf, likes to tinker with 'stuff' and has rescued a group of friends from the African wild by fixing a Land Rover with a jellybaby.

He's never been a great fan of physical exertion. In short (apart from the jellybaby incident), Wayne is an ordinary person. And he's about to do something really amazingly, astoundingly and astonishingly extra-ordinary. He's going to swim the the treacherous, never-been-swum-before channel between Kintyre (Scotland) and Ballycastle (Ireland). For charity. This is his story.